What do you WANT for Christmas this year? Is a little more PEACE at night on the list? If so, you're not alone. Peace seems to be the #1 desire of 80% of…
I helped my daughter pick out some flowers for her teacher this week to show her appreciation for ALL THE THINGS she has done for her this year.
At the last minute Friday morning, she scrambled to find a message to go with them. She had already made her a giant sized card out of poster board, but this girl doesn’t do anything half way. She copied these words on a little card, glued it to a dowel stick and inserted it into the vase and was finally satisfied with her offer.
These words can be found on countless Mother’s day cards, and who knows, maybe you will get one tomorrow with a similar message, because after all , isn’t that what we do?
ALL THE THINGS?
Our families are grateful.
Maybe that is the outcome we desire;
To be appreciated.
My question for you this morning is ,
“What is it costing you?”
Have you ever stood in the shower and watched the water level start rising around your feet?
It doesn’t take long to realized that something is blocking the flow of water.
Yesterday, as I stood ankle deep in a stagnant pool, I lifted the drain cover to reveal a mass of hair clogging the passageway. ( insert gag reflex)
As much as I dread digging into the scum encased tangles of who knows what kind of hair , if I want the water to start moving again, I have to get rid of the blockage.
I don’t know about you but I CHANGE MY MIND a lot.
Maybe I have a little perfectionism in me or it’s just that I like to weigh things carefully and consider all of my options.
My indecision can drive my husband crazy.
Anyone ever used this comeback when your man started rolling his eyes at your vacillation?
” I’m a woman. I have the right to change my mind.”
But seriously, this is why I practice minimalism as much as possible. The fewer decisions I have to make, the better.
I’m learning, however, that CHANGING MY MIND can be a good thing.
I came in the house the other night with my emotions leading the way.
They led me straight to the refrigerator where my brain came up with the best survival strategy it knew: peanut butter and chocolate ice cream. I took my bowl and sat down to digest it hoping that it would make me feel better about what I had just experienced. It tasted good going down, but when I got to the bottom of the bowl not only were the negative feelings still there, now I had a lump of ice cream just sitting in my gut along with my undigested emotions.
Instead of taking the time to digest my negative emotions I opted to ingest something more pleasurable.
I just wanted to FEEL BETTER.
Sometimes when a storm starts brewing inside of us we, with good intentions, go into survival mode by trying to make the best of it. We reach for our go to solution that has “served us well” in the past.
For me it’s ice cream; for you maybe it’s a glass of wine.
Most of my life I have struggled with the Why of being in a place that is hard.
I am passionate about people thriving and being in healthy environments. I believe that passion is ‘God wired’ and we long to thrive because “He has set eternity in our hearts.”
But does that mean if I find myself in an environment that is hard and full of unhealthy ingredients that I tuck tail and run for cover?
Does that mean that people only thrive in the best of circumstances?
…and what exactly are the ingredients to a healthy thriving place?
Ever had one of those evenings where you are racing against the clock to get things done? Afraid that if you stop and sit down you will be unable to DO all the things..
You know those things that NEED to be done.
Those things that every good mom, wife, or strong woman gets done in a day.
Those things that often keep us DOING and stop us from BEING.
What does that even mean? To BE.
I am all about ACTION VERBS.
When I read my Bible , those are the words I highlight.
GO. SET OUT. MOVE. RUN. REACH FORWARD.
Those are the commands that get me fired up. I’m like ,”Yes! Let’s do this thing!” It’s empowering.
It feels good to MOVE.
But those BEING verbs… those are hard.
Be Still. Be Strong. Be patient. Be content.
How DO you even learn to BE in the midst of all that needs to BE DONE?
I have been doing a little experiment with FOOD the last month.
I started my training to become certified as a HEALTH and WELLNESS/LIFE COACH and decided I needed to join in on the cleanse they were doing.
Y ‘all I am so not into FOOD FADS. I am too frugal to shop in the organic section of the grocery store, and I despise quinoa!
I decided to try this Cleanse/Healthy eating thing NOT because I am passionate about nutrition or getting some kind of result, but more out of curiosity…
” Mom, can I have some chocolate chip pancakes?”
“If you want to puke some more. Sure.”
My 11 yr old daughter has the FLU and we were only 24 hours out from a day spent over the toilet. So far she had tolerated Gatorade , a few popsicles, crackers, and a little white chili the night before. She was making progress and felt a lot better so why wouldn’t I let her?
I have been there , done that, and knew her body wasn’t ready to handle chocolate chip pancakes. I offered her a plain one, which she begrudgingly took.
Last night she chose to eat the Salmon and asparagus we were having for dinner and within an hour she was holding her stomach; cramping. A few minutes later, she was holding the toilet bowl.
Sometimes we just have to learn from our own experience…
Why is it that we ignore what we know is in our best interest and choose what we desire in the moment?
Have you ever eaten way too many warm, fresh baked brownies or gone back for a second piece of chocolate sheet cake because, ‘ how can something that tastes sooo good be bad?’
And then when you are curled up in a ball as your stomach pays the price for your indulgence, you swear on your life that you will never eat brownies again.
But the next time that familiar scent drifts through the air ..we forget.
Our bodies are just responding through their senses and our senses are telling us there is something pleasurable. It means well. It has good intentions. The craving, and the choice to eat a brownie is not the problem. It is a perfectly practical solution to our desire for pleasure. We were designed to experience it.
The problem is that we are responding through the craving loop vs using our critical thinking skills to make the decision. We aren’t accessing the part of the brain that stores memories from previous experiences; that remind us that the pleasure is fleeting and in the end, we will suffer.
So how do we stop our hand from grabbing the brownie?
It seems to do it without our permission doesn’t it?
Why are cravings such a powerful force?
I have to physically go through the motions to really learn something.
Don’t tell me what the apple tv password is. I will forget it. Don’t try and explain to me how to re set the Wifi and expect me to remember the next time it acts up. I will text you asking again..
If you want me to learn how to do something, I have to do it for myself; and not just once but multiple times until it becomes automatic.
I know this.
I am a Physical Therapist.
I am wired to move and I use this principle every day with my clients.